If you know me or have even followed me for some time, you'll know that this day really does mark a turning point for me. I haven't run competitively since my first marathon, and that was two years ago. I had torn a tendon that connects the adductor muscles to the pubic area (don't ask, quite the awkward tear!) and, since I was delayed in getting it looked at, my healing has also been slow and steady. Running has always been a huge part of my life: it's my therapy, a chance to let my worries go and unharness my creativity, my way of overcoming obstacles and achieving athletic goals. Being without it for almost two years has been a real mental challenge.
I've been working closely with my chiropractor, physical therapist, and massage therapist, as they truly believed that surgery wasn't necessary. It was a long, slow process of re-adjusting, massaging, strengthening, re-adjusting again, re-building, ice, heat, stretching, rest, recovery, wash-rinse-repeat. I remember my eyes welling up with tears as voiced my concerns to my physical therapist that I would never be able to run again. That thought felt as if I was losing something that I thought helped define me. She smiled, acknowledged my fears, but told me I had nothing to worry about.
A year later, I started doing 5Ks, learning pose running, really taking my time to correct what had gone wrong and ensure to the best of my ability that I would never do it again. But I also learned that I couldn't let my running (or lack thereof) define me: I have been in the best shape of my life, even without running, so I knew either way that I would persevere. But I loved it, too, and wanted that thrill, that adrenaline, that excitement of competing and breaking records to come back again.
So without iPod, in shoes that weren't exactly for the task at hand, I mounted that treadmill and mentally saw myself finishing the 5 mile program the day had in store. Despite slipping on my sweat and nearly face planting on the moving treadmill, I completed my first day and left the gym with a huge feeling of satisfaction....and two drenched towels that had sopped up the tears of my fat crying.
Am I 100%? Not yet, for as I sit here writing that little area is pulsing with activity. I'm more aware, I'm careful, but I'm also very determined. There seems to be a way around most things in life; may you always find the way that makes you stronger, happier, and that much more closer to reaching your success.
Here we go....1 day down, 62 to go. :)